Page 36 of 106
Re: IS THIS A JOKE ??
Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2018 3:30 pm
by peregrine
An old man and his wife were having their first argument after many years of marriage. He says, 'When we got married, you promised to love, honour and obey!' 'I know,' replies the wife. ' But I didn't want to start an argument in front of all those people.'
Re: IS THIS A JOKE ??
Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2018 8:17 pm
by Jacksparrow
Breaking news:
Man killed by Steamroller.
Police not sure what happened as evidence is thin on the ground.
Re: IS THIS A JOKE ??
Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 9:03 am
by Placido
Re: IS THIS A JOKE ??
Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 5:04 pm
by Placido
My soon-to-retire postieperson rang with a packet and remarked in a conversational voice:
'Had to go to the doctor because I have developed an aversion to supermarkets. He asked how long I'd had it and I told him, "Ever since I was a lidl boy".'
Re: IS THIS A JOKE ??
Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2018 9:06 am
by Willpar
Every lidl penny counts.
Re: IS THIS A JOKE ??
Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2018 8:26 pm
by Jacksparrow
Burnt my Hawaiian pizza tonight
I think I should have put it on aloha setting.
Re: IS THIS A JOKE ??
Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2018 8:30 pm
by Jacksparrow
How do you tell if an ant is a boy or girl, put it in some water, if it sinks it's girl ant if it floats it's buoyant
Re: IS THIS A JOKE ??
Posted: Sat Oct 13, 2018 5:39 pm
by Placido
Come back, Peregrine, all is forgiven
.
Re: IS THIS A JOKE ??
Posted: Wed Oct 17, 2018 9:51 am
by peregrine
My wife and I have the secret of making a marriage last. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant and have a little wine and good food. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.
The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his cheque-book open.
Re: IS THIS A JOKE ??
Posted: Wed Oct 17, 2018 8:00 pm
by Jacksparrow
Placido wrote:Come back, Peregrine, all is forgiven
.
Now look what you've started