Garden Wildlife UK

Posted: **Sun Dec 17, 2017 9:27 pm**

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Posted: **Mon Dec 18, 2017 11:57 am**

Posted: **Mon Dec 18, 2017 3:57 pm**

Placi

Jacksparrow

Posted: **Wed Dec 27, 2017 12:29 pm**

The four stages of life - You believe in Santa Claus - You don't believe in Santa Claus - You become Santa Claus - You look like Santa Claus.

The year you stop believing in Santa Claus is the year you start getting clothes for Christmas.

Posted: **Tue Jan 30, 2018 11:22 am**

Penguin walks into a bar and asks the barman, "Have you seen my brother?".
Barman: "I dunno. What does he look like?".

Posted: **Tue Jan 30, 2018 3:36 pm**

Posted: **Fri Feb 09, 2018 4:41 pm**

In his spare time my granddad races pigeons. I don't know why, he never beats them.

.What do you call a bird that has been dead a week? A humming bird

Posted: **Sat Feb 10, 2018 7:32 pm**

Doorbell rings and chap goes to the door. A 6ft tall cockroach is standing there: it grabs him by the tie, punches his face, throws him across the hall and jumps on him then runs away.
The man goes to the doctor for treatment, relates what happened to him and the doctor says, "Ah yes, there's a nasty bug going round".

Posted: **Sun Feb 11, 2018 5:03 pm**

Posted: **Sun Feb 11, 2018 9:22 pm**

A man goes to the Doctor and lays out his problems. He says whenever he sees a cat he yells "What's New, Pussycat?". When he walks up his drive he sings "Green Green Grass of Home", and speaking of his wife he keeps calling her Delilah, when her name is Susan!

The doctor says "Considering your symptoms, it sounds like you have Tom Jonesitis"

"Tom Jonesitis? I've never heard of that! Is it rare?"

"It's not unusual"

Garden Wildlife UK

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